Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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