"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
