just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I'm too high and old for this...
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
