i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize