I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
