thus making me awesome and them whores
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
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