I'm drive I can fine osifer
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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