Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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