there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize