is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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