i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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