When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize