it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
