We're like a lot better than the average bears
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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