I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
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