this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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