have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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