so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize