Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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