wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I'm sobbing to NWA
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize