She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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