smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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