Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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