i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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