He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
