yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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