There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
