As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize