69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
There's always time for handjobs
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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