I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
