U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
