dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
