his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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