I wanna passion pit in your ass
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
