...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
