Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
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