ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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