I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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