She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
