I'm jealous of your bromance
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
