Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize
