I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Randomize
