She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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