Got a toothbrush?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
The chlamydia really affected his face.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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