I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
