Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
