I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
