i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
