Just fell off a train. Bad.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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