i just made my gag reflex go away.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Randomize
