So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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