2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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