I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
